抱自己一下

這陣子的心情不是很好, 有一點想躲起來不見人的感覺.

不知道為什麼, 只知道應該獎勵一下自己, 逗自己開心一下,
抱抱自己, 然後說 "辛苦了''

"辛苦了...."

喜樂的眼淚

今天有機會在某機構幫忙敬拜團體Recruitment裡當interviewer.

由12點見人見到差不多6點, 累死了!!!

我們有一條問題是問''你是怎樣認識耶穌的呢?你是怎麼成為基督徒的呢?''
我因為這樣而聽了很多不同的故事.
一個一個的人在我眼前落淚.

讓很多人都覺得怎麼Recruitment也會搞到人哭?

聽了很多感人的故事. 感謝神用了這次機會來提醒我祂是多麼的奇妙.



看到別人哭, 我偷偷的也眼濕濕了一陣子....

那時喜樂的眼淚..

馬大的腳,馬利亞的心!

自己是個容易忙亂的人,
遇到任何tasks擺在面前,總希望盡快完成它,
但往往忽略了去領會某件事情的背面和深層意義!
我會稱這種狀態為馬大症候群 (Martha's Syndrome):
只顧忙亂,忙亂,忙亂......
只是聚焦於task-oriented,忽略了people-oriented的重要性,
更而偏離了God-oriented的原義!

在歌鄰過往事奉的日子,我驚覺自己太著重事情的成敗得失,
流於把自己放在事情的中心,未能全然觸摸和體貼上帝的脈搏!

噢!衪就是結果子樹的泉源!
是衪把樹栽種在溪水旁,提供了水份和養份,
讓樹苗茁壯成長!

就讓我重新re-prioritize我生命的各個細節,
不計較成敗得失,才能免於憂慮,
繼而全情投入生活中的每個階段!

願歌鄰人有著馬利亞的心,忙而不亂的步伐!
還記得主耶穌的應許嗎?讓我們抓緊衪:

"我是葡萄樹,你們是枝子.
常在我裡面的,我也常在他裡面,
這人就多結果子;
因為離了我,你們就不能做甚麼." (約15:5)

後語:
禱告後,心情輕鬆了,穩妥了,舒暢了,...微笑了!
"Try your best, He will do the rest!"

Dolce Momento

意大利文dolce momento是sweet moment的意思，
對你來說何時是甜蜜的時刻？
筆者認為無論在甚麼時刻，
倘若能夠察覺上帝的同在，
那就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我知道從創世以前上帝早已揀選了我，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我知道上帝將音樂恩賜給予我，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我用心彈琴敬拜上帝，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當與弟兄姊妹一起高聲敬拜上帝，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我獨自走著而知道上帝給我作伴，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我感低落而知道上帝明白我的心情，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我感絕望而知道上帝是我的盼望，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我軟弱無力又感受到上帝賜力量
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我擔重擔又感受到上帝給我釋放，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

當我流淚又感受到上帝抹去我的眼淚，
這就是甜蜜的時刻…

甜蜜的時刻實在數也數不盡，
筆者願意日後與你們分享更多dolce momento！

河流與管弦樂

曾經想過可以用兩幅圖畫來形容歌鄰的事奉團隊。

一幅是河流的圖畫。正如不同的山川、溪澗、深淵、瀑布，源遠流長，在這裡匯聚一起成為大江，在歌鄰事奉的弟兄姊妹也來自不同的教會及成長背景，在這裡加入團隊，在各個事工當中事奉。

不過我不太喜歡用河流這個比喻的原因是：當溪水流入大江之後，便徹底地失去了它的獨特性。本來溪澗的水性，在這道鴻流中再也沒跡可尋。這不是我想見到的事奉團隊。

另一幅是管弦樂團的圖畫。不同的音樂家，合作演奏出一首美麗的樂曲。觀眾坐著欣賞的時候，他們會聽到一首首悠揚動聽的音樂，被這隊管弦樂團演奏出來。一方面觀眾固然可以聽到樂曲的演譯，但與此同時，細心傾聽之下，也可以分辨出小提琴的演奏、大提琴的演奏、鋼琴的演奏、笛子的演奏、搞擊樂器的演奏。每件樂器雖在演奏同一樂章，卻從不失掉本身的聲音及獨特性。

這個就是我的心願。歌鄰的事奉團隊、歌鄰的敬拜隊，會像一隊管弦樂團。我們奏出好的音樂的同時，也不埋沒每個人的性情、風格、和呼召的獨特性。各自發揮功用，俾此佩搭。

要做到這樣的話，我們就不單要發掘和發揮各自的音樂恩賜，我們也需要認識俾此在音樂上的成長故事。例如，我們的音樂訓練、喜好、鐘愛，在音樂事奉上的期望、起跌、成敗得失等等。

以後幾次的練習，讓我們學習留心和珍惜俾此的成長故事。

Jealousy and Envy

Jealousy and Envy

Content comes from Rory Noland's The Heart of An Artist (chapter six)

Anger and Bitterness

• What is the feeling of jealousy?
• Anger: you are angry that they are more successful than you
• It’s difficult to admit because:
  - Covet: Against Biblical teaching
  - Shame
  - Admit to inferiority
• Therefore we often sweep it under the rug and pretend it’s not there
• It comes out in many ways: competition, bad-mouthing behind peoples’ back
• Eventually lead to bitterness:
  - you want those people to fail
  - Not only that we envy what others have but that we don’t want them to have it instead of us

Dealing with it
1. Confess it as sin

• Cultivate self-awareness – know when you are jealous
• Beware of denial
• Don’t hide it or justify it. Just admit it
• God knows your thought
• Tell Him that you need help
• Seek help

2. Appreciate your God-given talent

• While we are busy envying someone else’s talents, we forget about what God has given us
• What is it that God has given you to do well?

3. Give credit where credit is due

4. The real issue is faithfulness

• Parable of five talents, two talents, and one talents (Matthew 25)
• We don't know why some receive more than others
• But the real issue is not who gets what but whether I’m going to be faithful and obedient with what I’ve been given
• It is a stewardship issue

5. Quit comparing with others

• Gordon MacDonald: “the soul cannot be healthy when one compares himself or herself to others. The soul dies a bit every time it is involved in a lifestyle that competes. It gives way to the destructive forces of rivalry, envy and jealousy.”
• We need to discover our own talents
• So I can be secure about who God made me to be and what He’s called me to do
• We need to discover the unique role God has for us and fulfill it with enthusiasm
• Be content by being what God has called us to be rather than by trying to be someone else

6. Turning envy into worship

• Mathew 20 - Parable of the worship pastor and his worship team
• “Didn’t I pay you what we agreed upon? I haven’t cheated you out of anything. Can’t I do what I want with my money? Or are you envious because I am generous?”
• My envy can be turned to worship:
  - I can acknowledge God’s sovereignty in the way He distributes talents and abilities
  - I can worship His goodness for giving me more talent than I deserve
  - I can worship the Giver instead of the gift

7. Develop relationships instead of rivalries

• We tend to alienate ourselves from the people we envy
• Reverse this tendency: do everything we can to develop relationships with them
• The more we get to know them the less threatening they become
• Pray regularly for them
• God puts us together to work with each other not against each other
• Instead of competing, we can learn a lot from each other

Reflection Exercise

1. Write down the names of any people in your life toward whom you have feelings of jealousy and envy

2. Confess your sin of jealousy and envy to God and ask Him for His help in dealing with this sin

3. Think about how you can turn your jealousy and envy into worship

4. Describe the negative results of comparing yourself with others

5. Choose someone in your life to whom you can be accountable for how you handle feelings of jealousy and envy